Baby Fever!

Tonight as I write, there is rain pattering on the window outside, candlelight flickering on the walls and my husband in a deep sleep... But I can't get comfortable enough to fall asleep, so I got on our laptop and got on almost every woman's addiction, Pinterest! I usually look at the humor section first so that I can nudge Brandon if he's still awake and share some funnies with him. Then I move on to the women's apparel section & the beauty, drooling over clothes I will never be able to afford and hair styles I will never be able to pull off. Somehow though, I always wind up spending the majority of my time in the kids section, "ooing and awwing" over babies, therefore I believe it's safe to say that I now have what most call the "baby fever". Lately, my husband and I will be watching a show or a movie and there will be baby present, even if just for a brief second, I cannot get that baby's cuteness out of my head. I have begun to daydream of what our kids will look like, how they will act, if I will be a good mom? Questions and excitement overwhelm my mind. Heck even tonight we were at wal-mart and walked by the baby clothes section and I stopped to adore how cute and tiny the outfit was.

Before Brandon and I got married, we said that we wanted to wait at least 3-5 years before having kids. But now when we talk about it, although we still want to wait awhile, our timeline for children seems to get shorter and shorter. Don't worry friends, we are not rushing this decision by no means. I just want to express my excitement for being a mother in the future and having a wonderful husband to be by side for it. We will have children when God ordains it, whether that be within the next year, five years from now or not at all, we have to trust His timing even when the "baby fever" is running rampant through my blood right now. ;)

It will mean more than the world to me when Brandon & I have kids and he sticks around and is present as a Father in every way in their lives...because I grew up with many different men whom were cast as that role but were cut. I don't blame my mom by any means, she was protecting herself and I admire her courage for that. She is a good mother and I couldn't ask for a better person to have raised me; my mom did a damn good job for all she had to deal with along the way while raising us... Watching Brandon play and interact with my siblings (who range ages 3-21) he does a magnificent job especially with the younger ones, he sure knows how to show them love and have fun with them. While we were there over Christmas break, he played Nerf gun wars with Mark (3) and Leah (5) and I was so impressed how well he did with them! I believe my husband will be an exceptional and outstanding father when we get to that point.

Oh and one thing I also enjoy is thinking about names already! I have some beautiful ideas for names and my kids better love me for it. tehe. Welp, I am getting a little groggy so I am going to look at Pinterest some more and go to sleep. I'm sure Brandon is having some nightmare with the sound of keys clicking in it anyway... So dear friends, tell me... do you have the "baby fever"? ;)

mindless boredom

Do you ever have those days where nothing can satisfy your mind? I do quite a bit and I'm not sure why. While my husband and I are sitting down watching a movie at home, the movie can't quite keep my interest... It's not because the movie is boring but it's more like my mind can't rest; so I'll start playing on my phone, checking social networks every 5 minutes even though nothing's changed. Sometimes when I'm laying in bed, I can't even begin to rest because to my mind, sleep is boring so I want to get up and go do something at 11 o' clock at night but Brandon's is asleep to work the next day and I can't drive the manual truck. If it wasn't so cold outside, I would go on a walk but then again, I'm a 20 year old and I'd like to think attractive lady, so walking around late at night wouldn't be the brightest idea. So I do "THE LIST" as Sarah Jessica Parker would call it from I Don't Know How She Does It. Then I find myself distracted in conversations, a person will be talking to me and my mind will start thinking about a million different things as if the person's dialogue can't suffice the entertainment my mind desires. Praying is another thing that gets me... I'll be in the middle of a passionate plea when my mind starts planning out different scenarios of my life. Oh and the worst time that my mind just can't seem to be at rest is during sex... now don't get me wrong, my husband is amazing, I just can't seem to focus on the intimacy 100% and it's ridiculous... I can't ever seem to just BE!

So you as my fellow blogger, readers, friends, etc. Tell me what you think please! Do you have any solutions that can help my focus? Ease my mind to allow it to rest? Have you had these problems?